Oh I agree that it all needs to consciously and intentionally practiced every single day. It's too easy to let the muck of daily life interfere if we aren't being intentional, and often.

The hard part of relationships is when one person feels like they're stuck carrying the emotional load for the team—when one person feels like they're the ones who try to enhance clarity and communication and connection while their partner is just floating along or worse, is resistant to this. I know, because I was the one trying. Until I gave up because it felt like I was beating myself to pieces against a brick wall, and each time I was met with indifference or resistance, another part of me fell away until there was nothing left to motivate me.

Which is precisely why I've been doing things differently this time. I set the expectations for what I want and my partner and I practice regular check ins.

It's all a learning process, right?