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The Partner I Have is Not Who I Thought I’d Choose
Sometimes when you let go of what you think you want, you get what you need.
If you had asked me 20 years ago, or 10, or even 2, about the guy I’d walk into my future with, I would have described him wrong. I’d have placed too much emphasis on his career and hobbies, and not enough on how I feel when we’re together (safe, loved, able to relax, and just be myself).
I would have described a college education and a vague white-collar job. I’d have said he hits the gym regularly. I would have talked about how he played in a softball league or kickball, or the random basketball pick-up games, or mentioned that he did Crossfit. I would have told you about the home we made together in my hometown.
But I had that guy, and it turns out he wasn’t The One. I read another writer’s article recently (“4 Signs its Time to Move On” by Alessia Denaro); She listed five signs to know it’s time to end the relationship.
If only I had stumbled across her article years and years ago…
When I divorced my was-band of 13 years, I didn’t actively seek out his complete opposite. I knew I wanted someone who I felt more connected to, who was gentler and easier to talk to and have discussions with, and with whom I could share my most…
